11 Essential B.W. Albums of the 1970's

Lobo-Of a Simple Man(1972)
I warped the fuck out of my old man's already ragged eight track of this folk record,and by the time my buddy Wayne and I stayed up late to talk/whine about all the hairpig chicks who wanted nothing to do with us in our early teen years(foolish dames!) with this as the nightly soundtrack,you could hear multiple tracks playing at the same time.I found a German import cd years later,and rediscovered it all over again. A Simple Man,Don't Expect Me To Be Your Friend,A Big Red Kite,Recycle Sally,and the big hit,I'd Love You to Want Me are all stand-out tracks.

KISS-Destroyer(1976)
Yeah I was a proud member of the KISS Army back in 1978,and my bedroom was a shrine to these guys for a few years there,had a custom pair of Dingo boots painted to look like Gene's dragons,hell,I even did a Gene Simmons pose for the fourth grade class picture(pissed EVERYONE off,too)...at least until I got my hands on "Dynasty"(1980),their disco album,which ended my love affair abruptly,at least until enough years had passed that I could look back nostalgically anyway.This particular platter was always my favorite.God of Thunder,Detroit Rock City,Do You Love Me?,King of the Nighttime World,all find their way onto my mp3 player to this very day.Chief Bat Lizard,baby!

The Damned-Damned,Damned,Damned(1977)
Vanian and co. have always been one of my favorite bands,throughout their endless lineup changes/musical periods,and their first album still serves it up as loud,fast,and hard as anybody.There were quite a few piss-drunk evenings that ended in puddles of blood,shards of broken glass,and vandalized college dorms where this album served as catalyst.Born to Kill,New Rose,Neat,Neat,Neat,I Feel Alright,See Her Tonight,the whole tracklist is choice.

Adam and the Ants-Dirk Wears White Sox(1978)
In the junior high(I hear it's called "middle school" these days,bah!)I used to skip off school to smoke behind the public pool with my buddies,then head back to my house to jam out to this essential piece of Antmusic(the original vinyl,not the remixed re-release years later,mind you) while my mother covered my ass with the truant officer's phone call in the background.If Adam never evolved out of his punk phase,I'd have been cool with it.Catholic Day was my introduction to Levi Sta-Press and JFK's brain on Jackie O's knee.Other classic tracks include Cartrouble(pts 1 & 2),The Day I Met God,Never Trust a Man(With Egg on His Face),and Cleopatra.

Ted Nugent and the Amboy Dukes-Survival of the Fittest Live(1970)
The Nuge has always been the living embodiment of everything that rocks.The guy wails on guitar,writes arena-rocking anthems about poontang,hunts EVERY animal that walks the earth,and is a narcissistic Republican.I have ALL of his albums to this very day(minus the cheesy Damn Yankees crap,of course),and this turn of the seventies live disc has long been my favorite,since I wore out the red eight track daily back in my formative years.Of course,I came to appreciate it all the more as I grew into the legendary partier that I did,stumbling drunk,stoned,and insanely tripping on four double dipped white blotters through a foggy,decadent thirty-five person party in my bedroom in my parents' house,air guitaring my way through Papa's Will,my favorite tune.Rattle MY snake.Feel free to.

Gordon Lightfoot-Sundown(1974)
I was never much for acoustic guitars and folk songs growing up,but the 'Foot was one guy I always dug.I can remember riding in a '67 Chevy Impala with my parents along the Pa Interstate hearing the outstanding title track off this lp on the radio and thinking...groovy(popular word back then),Watchman's Gone,and top ten Carefree Highway also stand outs.Hell,I even like the 204 minute minutiae-laden nautical ballad Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald(off Summertime Dream,another great record) and listen to it on occasion,when I've got a few hours to spare...

Alice Cooper-School's Out(1972)
The Coop has always been at the top of my list,and this concept album plays like a musical photo album from my past.School's Out was a yearly last day of school ritual,the eight track signalling the start of another summer full of unforgettable moments,My Stars reminds me of long afternoons sick on my living room couch,television tray full of comic books,Famous Monsters magazines,and glasses of 7Up by my side.Alma Mater reminds me of Welcome Back Kotter,and Alice sure sounds like a meloncholy Barbarino in this song.Public Animal Number 9,well that's like the story of my life,ain't it!Klaatu barada nikto!

Andrea True Connection-More,More,More(1976)
Man,I hated disco.I used to bicker back and forth all day long in grade school with the idiots who thought they were the next Travolta.While everyone was learning the New York Hustle and dressing like cheesy nine year old Italian pimps,I was planning on a righteous black van with bubble window,chrome mags,an eight track player,and an air mattress in the back for whatever guys did back there with Farrah Fawcett Majors-looking chicks while The Nuge decimated my eardrums with Stranglehold.More,More,More was my terrible secret.I even called the AM radio stations to request it all the time,and when I mustered the courage up to finally go out and buy the whole album,I hid it behind all my rock records.The rest of the album sucks balls,for the record,but Andrea was the goods for a minute there,at the top of the charts,no longer a porn loop also-ran.You'll find the extended 6 minute mix on my mp3 player right now,if I ever let you get close enough to the damned thing.

Skrewdriver-All Skrewed Up(1978)
The politically correct do-goodnik brigade of retarded lefties will no doubt become belligerent at the inclusion of Ian Stuart's right wing nationalist musical propaganda machine in my list,but I'll be damned if the Blackpool boys weren't one helluva band in their day,and proof positive is the endless number of left wing "oi" bands whose whole sound is based on Ian's.Their first offering remains one of the best punk albums EVER.PERIOD.Though my glory days of smashing the red scum are probably behind me at this point,if the band ever wants to reform,I'll gladly offer up my dead balls rendition of Mister Donaldson on lead microphone,free of charge.

The Ramones-The Ramones(1974)
Face it,The Ramones were always a lot of fun,and their first album could be a greatest hits compilation on its own.I dare you to throw it in and not start a circle pit right where you stand.Blitzkrieg Bop,Judy is a Punk,Beat on the Brat,53rd and 3rd,Now I Wanna Sniff Some Glue,truly fantastic shit.

Teenage Jesus and the Jerks-s/t(1979)
It is said that Lydia Lunch's legendary no wave band singlehandedly destroyed the New York scene,one eighteen minute performance at a time,and I'm inclined to agree.Pure unadulterated chaotic noise,punctuated by screechy shouts and pouts,you either get it or you don't.Try Orphans,Freud in Flop,Baby Doll,The Closet,and Racemixing on for size.